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Readers Respond: What It's Like to Be Pregnant After a Miscarriage

Responses: 59

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Updated May 21, 2009

It's easy to assume that getting pregnant after a miscarriage will make your grief go away, and that can be true for some, but others may feel that having a previous miscarriage takes the joy out of pregnancy and just turns it into a time of anxiety and nervousness.

If you are currently pregnant or have been pregnant after a miscarriage, please share your thoughts about the experience. Do (or did) you feel differently about pregnancy after your previous experience? Are or were your feelings more of excitement, anxiety, or perhaps a mix of both?

I know how you feel!

Sometimes it's nice for someone to say I know how you feel, well I'm saying that to you today! I had a miscarriage in February 2010 and it was one of the hardest times of my life, I'm not entirely sure how I made it through! I'm now 5 weeks pregnant and scared to death, there is definitely no joy! I won't be scanned until 12 weeks and that seems like a lifetime off. Every little twinge or cramping or pain I rush to the bathroom to check for blood. I'm hoping and praying god grants me this tiny miracle I so desperately want to hold my little baby , but what can we do except wait and pray for each other x good luck everyone x
—Nessabennett

Scared with pregnancy after miscarriage

02/10, I lost my very first pregnancy at 6 weeks. I was so excited to be pregnant, not thinking it was ever going to be possible for me. Then, when the miscarriage came, I was heartbroken. Two months later, I found out I was pregnant again. This time, I was not excited. I was just scared. I am now 15 weeks 3 days, and its identical twins! I wish I could enjoy every step of this pregnancy, all I want is to hold my two babies and know that everything will be ok. But the worrying never stops. I can't wait for the check-ups and melt when I hear the heart beats. But as soon as I leave the doctors office, my worrying sets back in and I can't help but be nervous all the time. I pray I can carry this pregnancy to term and bring home my babies.
—Guest Mommy 2 Be

Pregnant with 3rd

I have a healthy 9 year old son, and got pregnant november 09. Went in for a gender check and found no heartbeat. I was 19 weeks!!! It was another boy. We were devastated. To make it all worse, when you're that far along you have to go thru total labor and deliver the baby that u know is dead. We're pregnant again, I'm 10 weeks now. almost thru my first trimester but I don't think that will help my worrying since I lost my last son in my second trimester. All I can do is take it easy and leave it in God's hands.
—Guest excited and scared

Fingers crossed

I've just had a miscarriage at 6 weeks and within 8 weeks I'm 6 weeks pregnant again. Scan wed so fingers crossed all is well. Wishin u all the best!
—Guest vonnie

Pregnant after 3 miscarriages

Hey everybody its inspirational hearing all your stories and knowing that other women have been through what I've been through because at the time it can feel like your the only person in the world that this has happened to. I had 2 miscarraiges in 09 and I had my 3rd in feb this year. I was over the moon when I found out I was pregnant again but am so so scared that the same thing is going to happen again. I'm praying for a mirracle and hope that god is on my side this time. I already have a 6 year old little boy who I love very very much. I had no complications with that pregnancy and took for granted that it would be as easy as that the next time. How wrong was I? It just shows that you can't take anything for granted. I just need to stay strong and positive. This time I am booked in for an early reassurance scan in 2 weeks time, fingers and toes crossed that this one's a little fighter and is staying put. Good luck to u all and hope u go on to have beautiful healthy babies x x x
—Guest Gemma

1 miscarriage, now pregnant

Found out I was pregnant in jan 2010, then had internal scan at 6-7 weeks as I 'just felt' that something was not right. I was told to go home as I could have miscalculated my dates (I didn't). After 2 more internal scans, it was confirmed that buba had stopped growing at 6 weeks. I was 10 weeks. 3 months later, (today) I found out that I am pregnant again! I have hundreds of thoughts going around my head. will this pregnancy see it through? who knows, just think that it is best to stay positive, try not to worry and enjoy it. good luck to all! x
—Guest jen

Excited and worried all in one

We found in January 2010 that we were expecting a baby and when I went in for my 10 week check up the baby only measured 7 weeks and there was no heatbeat. I had to have emergancy surgery because I was bleeding so bad, I lost so much blood that I nearly lost my life. We just found out that I am pregnant again. I am excited but very nervous and scared at the same time. I know they say that most woman go on to have a healthy pregnancy after a miscarriage but I am so nervous that times I find it so hard to be happy because I do not want to go through that again. Losing a baby is the hardest things I ever had to go through and I don't know if emotinally or physcially I can go through it again. So we are hoping and praying everything goes well. I am almost 7 weeks and I go to the Dr. next week.
—Guest Nanita

3 miscarriages, 2 years of fertility..

I have had 3 devastating miscarriages (as if there are any other kind), spent tens of thousands of dollars on fertility treatments/procedures/drugs, and am now pregnant again. I am so scared that we will lose it again.. the doctor says I have a 45% chance of miscarriage due to my age (2 months to 40) and previous miscarriage history. I struggle with whether or not to tell people because some who know my history really don't want to be told. I have come to the realization that those who have not had a miscarriage really do not know what to say to those who have...the whole situation makes them so uncomfortable that they can not deal with it. They really would rather not know. Unfortunately, as the number of losses increases, so does my need for supportive people. I also believe that God has things all planned for us, so I will trust in him, and pray for this little person growing inside me...
—Guest edrof

Having hope...

October of last year I was pregnant for the first time. I told my family and they were a lot less supportive than I was hoping and just when everyone got over it and started to be happy for me. I started to bleed. That same night my boyfriend was drunk and I had to leave for work in 10 min. I left and that night at work the most disgusting thing came out of me. It was traumatic and scary. It took about 4 months untill I was pregnant again and now I'm so scared I'll have a rerun of what happened last time. I actually went to a psychic and she told me to be positive and that things will get better. I'm not nesecarily a believer in that stuff but so far thinking positive is making my life a little brighter and I have one thing I didn't have last time... Hope.
—Guest Oh Capri...

Coral is preggo!

I'm 8 and a half wks pregnant after suffering 2 miscarriages last year. One of them was a suspected molar-but later turned out to be a normal missed m.c at 11 weeks. I am scared, but also feel soooo sick that I'm not able to dwell on it too much. Just counting down the days till my scan. Fingers crossed that we all have happy endings. Think positively and trust our bodies.
—Guest coral

terrified but ah well

For my first pregnancy everyone was so happy for me, then I lost it. Only one person said they were sorry, the rest said nothing. When it happened again I wished everyone would shut up and just let me wait and see how this one would progress. I still had to tell people because I act differently when pregnant. It's hard for people to realize that being pregnant does not always mean that you will bring a baby home in 9 months. I wish I had good friends that would throw me a baby shower, or even a few baby gifts but with my obstetrical history I'd rather not buy baby items until the fetus is at viability stage.
—Guest lost it's happiness

Embrace and try to stop worrying

Over the past eight years I have lost five babies and no matter how far you are or wether you have told anyone the loss is still the same. I am currently 13 weeks pregnant although at eight weeks I had a bleed and was astonished that after receiving an ultrasound that I was still pregnant. I had convinced myself that I had lost the baby and I was never going to be a mum again. Now I am trying to embrace the time I have with my baby growing in my tummy and take the time to relax and think of all the positive things that can ( and will LOL ) happen this time. I just think that you need to focus on the here and now and let nature take its course. It has a nasty habit of doing it anyway good or bad.
—Guest Joanne

Endless Worry

I had a miscarriage in October last year at 7 weeks (maybe more, maybe less my menstral cycle is very irregular) it was heartbreaking. I have PCOS and am currently taking Metformin which I have heard is supposed to reduce the chances of a miscarriage. My partner and I have been TTC since the beginning of the year. A few days ago I took a preg test which revealled a +ve result. I had had vaguely sensitive breasts in the days prior to taking the test, although nothing as I had experienced in my first pregnancy. So, over the last few days I have been more aware that my breasts are sore, I'm frequently unrinating and I'm tired. However, this morning I have woken up and my breasts do not feel sore unless - this seems like a worrying sign to me because this is what happened when I had my miscarriage. The only doctors appt I could get is in 4 days time! I am so convinced that my pregnancy has ended. How can I keep positive and stop thinking about it? I feel like I'm going insane!
—Guest unsure

Pregnancy after miscarriage - worried

I had a miscarriage in December 2010 at around 9 weeks. I am now pregnant again about 5 weeks and I have myself sick with worry. I had a dr appointment today but they wouldn't do the ultrasound because they didn't want to upset me if they couldn't see anything yet. I have to go and have my hormone levels checked on Saturday and Monday because they are supposed to double every 48 hours. I am not feeling the same symptoms as last time. My breasts hurt extremely bad the first pregnancy and now they are only mildly sore off and on. I don't have any nausea but I do feel tired and moody. My husband is getting really sick of my worrying. I am trying to trust that God is in control and I have to wait to see what unfolds.
—Baby022710

Pregnant after a miscarriage

In Oct 08 I was about 13 weeks when I went to the doc to get my check-up to find out there was no heartbeat but I was still carring the baby that had past at 9 weeks. So I had to have a D&C and let them take the baby out. I already have two boys but I would love to have another kid. I have been pregnant 6 times however and I know some people don't like to hear abortion but at times in my life I just coudn't do it. I really wanted my last baby but I guess god says you don't have them when you want them. Me and my boyfriend have been trying and again since and I had started to give up. Then soon as I did I just found out I'm pregnant from a home test. I have to wait to get my Medicaid to go to the doc but I'm anxious to know what's going on so I think I need to go to the emergency room but dont want to waste their time. But I have no choice, I need to know.
—Guest silva
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  5. Pregnant After Miscarriage - What It's Like to Be Pregnant After Miscarriage

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